Nut Bucket Films

the Queen Mary busted us up on Halloween

In Uncategorized on October 29, 2010 at 10:41 am


woah...the entrance to the Queen Mary


A couple of days ago I was searching around for things to do on Halloween, exploring options like the Corn Maze at Pierce College and the Haunted Hayride (I did it last night).  I ran across one of my buddies talking about going to the Queen Mary.  I didn’t really have any interest in doing it so I asked him if he wanted to go to the Corn Maze.  I told him I heard the  maze had dudes with chainsaws that chase you around.  That was all I needed to hear.  Texas Chainsaw Massacre.  He got excited about it, but by the time communication was at full-force it was 9PM.  Freakin’ Facebook.  The Corn Maze ends at 10PM.  Fortunately, the Queen Mary was open til Midnight.  I hopped online and did some quick research and in minutes I was like, “Dude, Let’s Roll!”  Online it talks about twenty-foot flames and seven different mazes and 166 monsters and all the other shit that will get you fired up to get scared.

I had high expectations though.  The Queen Mary is supposed to be haunted already.  So Ryan snagged me around 9:30 and we cruised down to Long Beach.  We were convinced to going on a Wednesday was the thing to do since the lines on the weekends would be insane and it also might get a little ghetto down there.

We made it down therewith the quickness.  There was barely anyone there.  There were roped off spots for lines for miles but they were empty.  I couldn’t imagine waiting for this stuff.  It was set up like Disneyland.  We cruised up, paid our $35(steeeeeep) for a ticket and rolled passed through security.  But not before getting patted down for weapons and bombs.  It made me feel safer, sort of.


safety first


There are two ways to be scared in real life.

#1  The element of surprise.  Someone sneaks up on you and catches you when you are not looking or not expecting it.  That lasts for the time being.  The moment.  You get scared and then you move on.  Then you might get scared again and then you move on.  After a while it is hard to get scared in that sort of fashion.

Right when we got to the park we went in the first maze.  It was dark and there were monsters hired to scare you everywhere.


metal fingers

We kept jumping and getting a little freaked out.  The very first monster that came out friggin’ hit my hand and snapped my finger.  Either that or I hit myself with my own finger.  It still hurts today.  Oh, and the second monster kicked me in the shin.  That hurts too.  The first maze was dark so it was more scary than the others.  But it was only scary in the #1 sort of way.


#2  The type of, “Could this shit REALLY happen to me?” at another time in life.  Like a psycho stabbing his family or a worker at the theme park going nuts and actually killing a patron.  Your house being haunted like Paranormal Activity.  So, going though these mazes over and over and having these hired monsters stare you down and follow you super close, #2 thoughts start to go through my head.  Like what if these people go nuts and stab someone.  We got patted down by security, but who patted THEM down?


#2 kind of scary


We made it though every maze, seven total, in about an hour.  There were no lines and barely anyone there.  We lucked out because of no one there, it made it more scary since everyone we ran into was a monster.  Not really any normal folk.

The second maze was the most fun and scary.  It was called The Village.  I just remember it being full of cool stuff and really long and monsters that would fly by you on their knees skidding across the ground!  The mazes on the Queen Mary were cool too.  But not because they were scary.  I was bored by then.  But the ship was cool.  You cannot recreate that.  You could see deep and down into the ship’s underneath and out the little round windows into the ocean.  That was creepy, not the monsters.  It was like roaming around in the Titanic.

We were in one of the mazes in the Queen Mary and passed these two girl monsters and Ryan goes, “The blonde one is hot,” and I felt bad immediately and was like, “Dude, you can’t compliment one girl monster when the other is right next to her.  That’s f%^&ed up!  You are going to make the other monster feel bad.”

We were a bit jumpy the whole time even though we got kind of used to it.  After two mazes the rest were just different scenery.

Ryan kept jumping into this defense Karate stance every time he would get startled.  Pretty funny because even though he looked like an idiot and knew it, he kept defaulting to the Kung-Fu-arms-crossed and knees-bent stance.  Idiot.

We topped it off with some funnel cake and a strawberry lemonade.  I wanted to get a picture of the twenty-foot flames so I stood there trying to time my blackberry right for at least a couple of minutes.  Ryan was like, “Dude, just go to Burning Man.”  I said I had no interest in going to Burning Man.  I got the picture.


20-foot flames


I will leave you with a question.  How many monsters get punched in the face just off of people’s reactions to getting scared.  I want that statistic.  I know I almost punched a couple monsters.  But not on purpose.

Happy Halloween,


Nut Bucket Films is going to do a Horror Film next.


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